Hi Loves! Hope you're all having a great week! So I'm sure most of you have seen or may have heard that Jennifer Lopez recently released a book called, "True Love." My cousin asked me if I wanted to read it than face time about it afterwards kind of like a mini book club. I've always loved Jennifer Lopez so I immediately went out and purchased the book. I read it within two days. It was a light easy read broken up with beautiful photos of her life, as well as inspiring quotes. Her main message in the book was that in order to have a healthy genuine love with someone, you first have to love yourself. She repeated this a lot which at first to me seemed a bit repetitive but than I realized this; loving yourself and staying positive is like building a muscle and it has to be worked on daily in order to maintain it. Here are some pieces of the book that really stuck a personal cord for me that hopefully you can relate to as well.
"In the end, the truth finds a way to surface, even if you don't want it to" ~
When I think about all my past relationships, this quote couldn't be truer. We've all been there! Where you get that sick feeling in the pit of your stomach because all the red flags of that relationship are coming to a head. You can't deny it, whether you're being treated bad or you just don't feel it~you know it. One of my year long relationships when I was about 26, I was with the sweetest most caring guy, but I just didn't love him as much as he loved me, which was odd because all my life I always felt it was the other way around. But this time I knew it wasn't right, after planning on breaking up with him one night I drank lots of wine at dinner and the more buzzed I was the crazier my idea of dumping him was so I stayed over as I usually did. Yet when I woke up in the morning my buzz was gone, and I couldn't pretend anymore. And there it was; that pit in my stomach again. I knew what I had to do.
When I think about all my past relationships, this quote couldn't be truer. We've all been there! Where you get that sick feeling in the pit of your stomach because all the red flags of that relationship are coming to a head. You can't deny it, whether you're being treated bad or you just don't feel it~you know it. One of my year long relationships when I was about 26, I was with the sweetest most caring guy, but I just didn't love him as much as he loved me, which was odd because all my life I always felt it was the other way around. But this time I knew it wasn't right, after planning on breaking up with him one night I drank lots of wine at dinner and the more buzzed I was the crazier my idea of dumping him was so I stayed over as I usually did. Yet when I woke up in the morning my buzz was gone, and I couldn't pretend anymore. And there it was; that pit in my stomach again. I knew what I had to do.
"The only way you can be mistreated is by allowing yourself to be mistreated"~
This is such a simple concept, but there are so many women that still have a hard time following it. The one relationship that stands out to me in this was one of my exes who was right before the previous one I had just spoken about who treated me amazing. Well this relationship at 24 could not have been anymore the opposite. At first, he was charming and swept me off my feet but that didn't last long. He was completely verbally abusive, yet it wasn't in the yelling at me or cursing at me way; it was more so in the subtle sneaky way. He'd try to make me look stupid in front of others, such as waiters or other pretty females in my presence and things like that. Slowly but surely all of his snide remarks started to chip at my self-esteem. I finally walked away for good and it took a while to recover afterwards, the side effects of dating a narcissist definitely took it's toll. I finally had to realize it would only continue if I allowed it too.
This is such a simple concept, but there are so many women that still have a hard time following it. The one relationship that stands out to me in this was one of my exes who was right before the previous one I had just spoken about who treated me amazing. Well this relationship at 24 could not have been anymore the opposite. At first, he was charming and swept me off my feet but that didn't last long. He was completely verbally abusive, yet it wasn't in the yelling at me or cursing at me way; it was more so in the subtle sneaky way. He'd try to make me look stupid in front of others, such as waiters or other pretty females in my presence and things like that. Slowly but surely all of his snide remarks started to chip at my self-esteem. I finally walked away for good and it took a while to recover afterwards, the side effects of dating a narcissist definitely took it's toll. I finally had to realize it would only continue if I allowed it too.
"Sometimes you have to explore the darkness to get to the light and get back to who you are" ~
Oh heartache, I'd like to tell you that it gets easier but usually it doesn't. Especially if you love with all your heart and are all or nothing like I am, and as I read JLo is too. I think what does get better as you go through each breakup, you do realize that you will get through it because you've gotten through them before. Last summer when my boyfriend broke up with me, I was devastated. I was 30 years old and had placed so much hope that he could be the one. But I got through it, and the way I did that was to just feel the pain, accept it, and so that that way I was then able to move on.
Oh heartache, I'd like to tell you that it gets easier but usually it doesn't. Especially if you love with all your heart and are all or nothing like I am, and as I read JLo is too. I think what does get better as you go through each breakup, you do realize that you will get through it because you've gotten through them before. Last summer when my boyfriend broke up with me, I was devastated. I was 30 years old and had placed so much hope that he could be the one. But I got through it, and the way I did that was to just feel the pain, accept it, and so that that way I was then able to move on.
"When you give your time, your love, your respect, you deserve respect in return. You deserve comfort, you deserve honesty, and you deserve to feel safe" ~
This is it, this is the key, the answer to the road to "True Love." In a solid relationship, there should be a comfort in being able to fully be yourself and most importantly to feel safe. I don't mean safe in the way where your love will beat up someone for you either. I'm talking about the safety of knowing that you are in a healthy and secure relationship where you aren't afraid of letting them see every piece of you because you know they'll accept your flaws and all. If you have to question any of the above then it's time to let go. And I promise you that you'll find it in someone if you aren't getting it in your current situation. Last August, barely two months after my breakup I reconnected with my childhood guy best friend. We never had dated growing up but I always felt a safeness and comfort with him. Now were madly in love and it is truly the easiest and healthiest relationship I've ever been in. I'll be 32 in a few weeks and I finally feel like I've gotten it right.
So there are some of the inspiring quotes from JLo's new book! It got me thinking about my love life and how far I've come. But I couldn't have gotten there without going through the other relationships I was in before. As well as finding that inner love for myself as well; cause we all deserve TRUE LOVE!
This is it, this is the key, the answer to the road to "True Love." In a solid relationship, there should be a comfort in being able to fully be yourself and most importantly to feel safe. I don't mean safe in the way where your love will beat up someone for you either. I'm talking about the safety of knowing that you are in a healthy and secure relationship where you aren't afraid of letting them see every piece of you because you know they'll accept your flaws and all. If you have to question any of the above then it's time to let go. And I promise you that you'll find it in someone if you aren't getting it in your current situation. Last August, barely two months after my breakup I reconnected with my childhood guy best friend. We never had dated growing up but I always felt a safeness and comfort with him. Now were madly in love and it is truly the easiest and healthiest relationship I've ever been in. I'll be 32 in a few weeks and I finally feel like I've gotten it right.
So there are some of the inspiring quotes from JLo's new book! It got me thinking about my love life and how far I've come. But I couldn't have gotten there without going through the other relationships I was in before. As well as finding that inner love for myself as well; cause we all deserve TRUE LOVE!
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